I'm Glad I'm Not Young Anymore - Maurice Chevalier

Poor boy! Poor boy!\nDown-hearted and depressed and in a spin\nPoor boy! Poor boy!\nOh, youth can really do a fellow in!\nHow lovely to sit here in the shade\nWith none of the woes of man and maid\nI’m glad I’m not young anymore\nThe rivals that don’t exist at all\nThe feeling you’re only two feet tall\nI’m glad that I’m not young anymore\nNo more confusion\nNo morning-after surprise\nNo self-delusion\nThat when you’re telling those lies\nShe isn’t wise\nAnd even if love comes through the door\nThe chance that goes on forevermore\nForevermore is shorter than before\nOh, I’m so glad that I’m not young anymore\nThe tiny remark that tortures you\nThe fear that your friends won’t like her too\nI’m glad I’m not young anymore\nThe longing to end the stale affair\nUntil you find out she doesn’t care\nI’m glad that I’m not young anymore\nNo more frustration\nNo star-crossed lover am I\nNo aggravation\nJust one reluctant reply\n«Lady, goodbye!»\nThe Fountain of Youth is dull as paint\nMethuselah is my patron saint\nI’ve never been so comfortable before\nOh, I’m so glad that I’m not young anymore